I want you to know something. The saying “you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone” has more truth to it in most of our lives than we know. But, there’s something that can actually hurt a little worse, I think.
It hurts to know what you’ve got, but still have to let it go.
Sometimes we take things for granted, as if they will always be. We do that probably more than we know, actually. But still, in our best of times, we realize what we have; we realize that this moment, this person is special, and the likes of which does not and will not come around again. You know, the kind of moments or people that are even hard to find in a movie; the ones that change your life so dramatically and shift who you are so fundamentally that there really is nothing to compare him or her or it to.
It hurts to know that, and still have to say goodbye.
There is freedom here, though. Compared to not knowing what you’ve got till it, or he, or she, is gone I believe freedom exists when we know what we have and we willfully and consciously release him or her or it to God.
Does that make any sense?
I hope so, because here is where we can realize that what we have isn’t really ours to begin with. We can realize that we are all in a drama of sorts, and our characters are slowly finding our paths, our niches, our purposes. Donald Miller, the author of Blue Like Jazz and Through Painted Deserts, has referred to this drama and the finding of our paths as the “great dance with God;” a dance that sometimes feels good and sometimes doesn’t make sense, but all the while we are giving and receiving, losing and winning, letting go and taking back. Our paths and purposes may cross or intersect for a while, and then maybe run parallel to each other, and then may turn at right angles away from each other for a time. But they are still ours to tread, and we still have a Guide who loves us and is painting a more beautiful picture and writing a more wonderful story than we could imagine on our own.
Even knowing that, though, the dull, emotional ache in your heart doesn’t really lessen after you let someone or something go that means so much to you, more than words can really describe. But it’s still true.
Have you ever felt the dull ache in your heart from letting someone or something go, all the while still knowing that it’s right?